Lille tour match report

Old Brods Lille Tour 2010

On Friday 30th April, the Old Brodleians under 17s embarked on what was to be arguably the greatest tour of all time. Armed with whoopee cushion outfits, alcohol, music and of course the dreaded ‘tub of turbulence’ we were all set and ready to go.
After hours of jokes, fighting and utter madness fuelled by a quite memorable rendition of ‘She Will be Loved’ by George ‘zippy’ Ashton, we eventually arrived in Lille where we had all agreed to have a few drinks and get an early night ahead of the tournament the following day, well if by a few drinks I mean nearly thrown out of our hotel, taking pictures of topless props, stealing road signs, irresponsible Irish men getting whisked away in ambulances and coaches escorted back to the hotel by the police, then I would say that yes, we had a few drinks and got an early night.

The following morning the lads were not overly optimistic about the tournament due to some mishaps on the first night. A few games of cards and some kick tennis were deemed an appropriate warm up for what was to be a tough rugby day. Our first game was against Fullerians RFC, reining Hertfordshire Champions, who we soon discovered were extremely physical and difficult to break down. However we did manage to secure a one try victory due to a very well worked move from our back line which Chris Vine finished brilliantly. It should also be mentioned that our captain Jack Martin was a big contributor in the victory managing to get himself sin binned in the match. We love a captain who can lead by example.

This victory gave us the lift we needed to carry us through to the next game with the support of the dads’ who cheered us all the way, sober and drunk! We faced a hardworking Dutch side, Oysterwijk Oysters who showed regardless of ability, hard work counts for a lot. Will Leah, Richard Stokes, Chris Vine, Louie Butler and Gareth Moger each scoring in a 7 tries to 2 victory.

Confidence was now sky high, and we went in our final game with the night before catching up and already qualified for the cup semi finals the next day. Colchester came out all guns blazing and beat the tiring Brods side 20-0. Later that night The Chinese was the most popular choice boasting an all you can eat buffet for 12 euro 50. We then headed back to our hotel where we were kindly invited along to a wedding reception, and well, let’s just say it’s a wedding reception the happy couple will never forget.

On the Sunday we set off in hope of silverware. The team that stood in our way en route to the final was Wolverhampton RUFC who knocked us out on what was a ridiculous rule that should the match end in a score draw the team that scores first went through. Had we known this prior to Chris Vine’s last minute equalizing try then we might not have celebrated quite as much!

Knocked back from this defeat we were then to play host club RC Arras in the bowl final, in what was to be our last game under Head Coach Gary Wilson. The lads struggled to communicate with the French referee, resulting in a penalty try for the hosts from 5 meters out, the crime? Hands in the ruck! We lost 2 tries to 1; despite scoring first through Chris Vine, Viney showed just what an amazing finisher he is with the try of the tournament, running from his own 22, beating the entire opposition and going over in the corner. Despite losing out, I think it is safe to say that we did the coaches proud for the ‘show’ we provided during and after the game. I would go into detail, but we all know what goes on tour stays on tour! I just want to quote the great Neil ‘Shed’ Sheard, ‘The winner of the tournament will be forgotten, but every team will remember the Brods.’

Because of the ‘banter’ that the lads provided we attracted the attention of other clubs, one of which, Battersea Ironsides RUFC, who we had loaned players to during the tournament, were a great a set of lads and will hopefully be visiting Hipperholme next season.

After the game we collected our medals, setting a trend by singing ‘just a bunch of Brodleians’ in the process, making the other sides look on in envy. Then came the tour court, we were joined by players from Battersea and Fullerians, who were fined for not being Brods, and got on with handing out sentences for ‘incidents’ that occurred throughout the weekend.

On our final night of the tour, the vast majority of the team headed to a pizza place where stories were told and red wine was drunk, I think its brilliant how lads at 17 know their limit with alcohol.
The final day of the tour started off with tired faces and moody gits on what was to be a long journey home. As we departed France we came across a ‘damsel in distress’ if you like. Melvin the M and M, crying and pleading for somebody to save him from the customs in Calais. He was rescued by the oh so caring Brodleians and quickly became the newest addition to the team. The fines money was spent at a supermarket in Calais, the ‘refreshments’ loaded onto the bus and a very quiet journey home followed.